Procrastination and Guilt

Teeth gritted. Muscles tense.

Motivation rises.

The list is locked in.

I reward myself by scrolling.

Scrolling and scrolling and scrolling.

Minutes pass, then hours.

Today is gone.

Time to prepare for tomorrow.

That’s okay.

Tomorrow will be the day.

At least that is the mantra on repeat.

I did not fail.

I just waited for a better time.

Didn’t get it done when I said I would,

but that lie was only told to me.

The next day I reset.

I will achieve this.

I will celebrate.

Something comes up.

It always does.

This will have to wait.

Not my fault it didn’t get done.

I keep circling back.

I arrive, then turn away.

Procrastination is always ready,

more appealing than what matters most.

That’s how it happens, isn’t it?

Something settles deep inside,

a need your soul wants fulfilled,

and still you put it off.

What would it mean if it were done?

What comes next?

Should I risk the unknown…

or keep welcoming the familiar feeling of failure?

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If this felt familiar, you’re not alone.

You can stay with me here. 🫶🏻